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  “I knew you’d be this way. That’s why I’m not giving you any choice.” She sat next to him. “What do you mean you’ve been a spacer since you were fifteen? You didn’t join the military until you were eighteen.”

  He rested his throbbing head on her lap. “Oh, finally something you don’t know about me, huh?”

  She stroked his hair, running cool fingers over his burning forehead.

  “I was one of the test pilots for the slingshot launch system,” Javan mumbled.

  “When you were fifteen?”

  “They rounded up a bunch of street kids who wouldn’t be missed if something happened to them.”

  “Like what?”

  “What do you mean like what? Do you know how many people died getting the quirks in the slingshot launch worked out? Not a very pleasant death either: getting ripped apart by G-force, brain imploding, burned alive trying to break atmo.”

  Her fingers were soothing, almost letting him forget the terror of those launches.

  “There was nothing in your file about this. According to your official record, you joined the military at eighteen after scoring off the charts on the entrance exam.”

  “My father died at sea when I was nine. My mother and I were starving, so we went to Athens. She found work in one of the munitions factories. One day she went to work, and I never saw her again. I survived by begging and stealing. Six years later I woke up in a military prison. The very next day I was strapped into an autoship and launched.” Sola’s fingers kept working, drawing out words he’d never spoken before. “After three years I’d learned so much about the launch process that they allowed me to test. I rose through the ranks. There were a lot of opportunities for that during the war. I made captain just in time for the Battle of Lunar Base.”

  “Decorated for valor, then allied with one of the most powerful Blue families via marriage to Morna McKenzie. It was glorious accomplishment for the son of a fisherman, Javan.” She dropped her fingers to his abdomen. “But then…your downfall. You were thrown out of the military. That’s where your file ends. And then fifteen years of smuggling and drinking? What happened, Javan?”

  He sighed. “I’d been saving my military pay for years. Morna took everything except for a small private account. I bought the Kypris at auction. There’s nothing else to tell.”

  “There must be more to it than that.” She unbuttoned his shirt. “Tell me the rest. Please.”

  It was the whispered please that convinced him to tell her everything. It would be such a relief. “Do you know what I did at the Battle of Lunar Base?”

  “You delivered the first decisive victory in the war against the rebels. You saved Earth from getting nuked. You saved us all.”

  “It wasn’t quite like that.”

  She propped her head on her hand. “Tell me.”

  He dragged his gaze away from hers. “About two dozen major cities were allied to the rebels, but Lunar Base was their headquarters. Their leaders were there. I knew it wasn’t enough to just have dogfights with their fighter ships. I gave the order to bomb the base.”

  She kissed his cheek gently.

  “When we entered the base, there’d been so many breaches that we had to suit up. When we got to the interior of the base, that’s when we realized.”

  “Realized what?”

  The words came out in a rush. “The rebels were dead. So were all the civilians. We didn’t know they had their families with them. We weren’t told. Women, children—all dead and floating around. Infants. Gallons of blood, in individual droplets…just floating around.” He grimaced and fell silent.

  Sola waited, her fingers working patiently. “It was war, Javan. Terrible things happen in war.”

  He shrugged her off and closed his eyes. “When I gave the order to bomb the base…I knew it would destroy us. When their nukes went off, we’d all be wiped out or die slowly from radiation sickness. I ordered it anyway. I had to save Earth. But there were no nukes. We were lied to. The rebels were never a threat to Earth—just to your father. I murdered those people for nothing. I’m not a hero. I’m a murderer.”

  Sola grabbed his shoulders and forced him to look at her. “You were manipulated by my father like so many before you, like so many after you. It changes nothing. You went on a suicide mission. You thought you were saving Earth and everybody on it.”

  He pushed her away. “When I got back to Earth, I accepted the hero’s welcome, I allowed the marriage, but when I was ordered to wipe out the civilian population of New York City, I couldn’t do it. Only some of the people were allied to the rebels, but your father didn’t care. He took advantage of the rebellion to carry out genocide. He wanted Earth’s population under control. He could have built colony ships, but mass murder was easier, cheaper. I…I couldn’t do it. Eventually they found someone more capable than me.”

  “Destin Grady.”

  He nodded. “I would not be his pawn. But Grady—he had no qualms. He did what your father required.”

  “Why did my father let you live? He made you a Blue. You made him look a fool.”

  Javan allowed himself a bitter smile. “He told his men to take me back where I’d been found and kill me. They dumped me out in the middle of the Aegean. Not a very good way to kill someone who could swim before he could walk. I swam for… I don’t know. It felt like days. I made my way back to Athens, bought this tub. You know the rest. But what does it matter? He won’t let me live this time.”

  “And that’s why we have to find you a safe place. A nice place, I promise, with beautiful water for you to swim in.” She unzipped his flight pants.

  “Are you going to at least untie me before you have sex with me?”

  “No. I’m not.”

  “Why are you supposed to kill me? Why is that part of the plan? In fact, what is your plan? Take over from your father? Rule the galaxy?”

  “Not quite. Unseat my father, yes. Rule the galaxy? No. Kill you? No, I won’t do it. Although you know too much now.”

  “Why can’t you kill me?” He moved his bound wrists and trailed his fingers up her leg.

  “Something you did for me once. When I was looking through the files to find someone who might be suitable for this job, I saw your face. I just said ‘him—I want him.’ I’d always assumed my father had had you killed. I was so happy to discover you were alive.”

  “What did I do for you? I don’t even remember you from back then.”

  Limbs trembling, Sola turned onto her back to allow his hands to wander over her body. She closed her eyes. “When I cried at your wedding—showing emotion wasn’t allowed.”

  “Were you punished?”

  “I was sent for training years earlier than I should have been. Years, oh years, of training. They starved me and beat me. They trained me in weapons, sex, espionage, torture—everything. And they kept testing me until I tested the way they wanted.”

  “And how was that?”

  “Until I tested psychopathological.”

  “What do you mean? Until you were a psychopath?”

  “Correct.”

  “So did you cheat on the test?”

  “Only a little, Javan. Please remember that.”

  He kissed her stomach. “And what was it I did for you?”

  “I wanted to fail and I wanted to die, just so they would stop torturing me, just so they would leave me alone. Your face would come to me in my worst moments. You gave me strength to keep going. Because I knew if I wanted to be like you, I’d have to endure it.”

  “Be like me?” He flicked open the front of her gossamer gown.

  She arched toward him, toward his fingers, toward his mouth. “I wanted to be a hero. I still do. I have to destroy my father.”

  He took her face in his hands, straining the straps that bound his wrists. “I’m not a hero.”

  “Yes, you are. You stood up to the dictator. You showed us it could be done. You are a hero.”

  Her mouth closed on his, and as always,
he was lost as the waves of desire and emotion built within him. He was in love with her. She was his wife. She carried his child. But what was she? She was barely human, emotionally, psychologically and biologically. But what was he to do? He loved her, and nothing could change that.

  But he would have to handle her carefully, to test her as she’d once been tested, and this time there would be no cheating. It involved love and trust. And she had to pass; otherwise they were in the kind of trouble that couldn’t be fixed but could only be suffered. And dammit, he was through with suffering.

  He longed to hear her call his name, to cry out that she loved him, so he bent to the task, kissing her breast, nipping at the tender skin of her neck. “Are you going to untie me?” he murmured huskily.

  “No,” she moaned, quivering under his mouth and hands.

  “You’ll have to eventually. You need me to fly the ship.”

  “Oh, Javan.” With a sudden movement, she twisted on top of him and released his straining cock. She lowered slowly, inch by inch, enveloping him in moist heat. “When will you learn to stop underestimating me?”

  It was quite some time before he was capable of giving her an answer.

  She was right. He had underestimated her—again. Her voice came over the intercom.

  “Focus, Javan. We’re going to jump.”

  He had a moment of panic wondering if she’d put in the correct coordinates. She started to count down, and without even trying, he focused on a wish, a desire to have him and Sola and the coming baby somewhere safe, somewhere he could protect them.

  They jumped.

  He recovered almost immediately, relieved to find they hadn’t jumped through a gas giant or become embedded in a rock planet. As suspected, she soon came rushing in to check on him. She undid most of the straps, and he let his head loll back while she called his name anxiously. He almost had her. If only his mouth hadn’t curved into a smile.

  “You bastard!” She punched his chest—hard.

  He sat up, smirking. “You can’t deny me a little revenge.”

  “What did I do?” She held her hands upward, her face pure innocence except for the wicked smile.

  “I need to take a pressure shower. After those terrible, disgusting things you did to me—” his cock gave a longing twitch, “—I feel the need to clean myself up. You’re gonna have to untie me, my lady.”

  After a flurry of tying and untying and tying again, he found himself on his tiptoes with his arms above his head as he dangled from the bulkhead. “I still can’t get to the shower.”

  “No, but you do look quite magnificent.” She ran her hands up and down his tensed body. “You’re even more beautiful now than when you were twenty-two.” She touched a mottled scar on his thigh. “Where did you get this?”

  “One of my first launches. There was a fire in the cockpit.”

  She kissed the scar and continued. “What about this one?” She traced a thin red scar on his shoulder.

  “A Brazilian whore.” He smiled at the memory; Sola scowled.

  His smile broadened. “She tried to rob me when she thought she’d exhausted me. You’d have liked her.”

  Her scowl deepened. “This one?” She fingered a jagged scar on his chest.

  “Olympia Philou. I wouldn’t tell her I loved her.”

  “So she tortured you?”

  “Yes, but I still wouldn’t tell her.” He looked into her eyes. “I love you, Sola.”

  She gasped and turned away. “Don’t say that!”

  “And you love me too.”

  She whirled around to face him. “I do not!”

  “Yes, you do. You say it over and over again when we make love.”

  “That doesn’t count!”

  She was terrified, and he almost felt sorry for her. “Oh, poor Sola. All that training, all that pain and suffering. Haven’t you realized anything since you’ve been on this ship?”

  She shook her head.

  Now he really did feel sorry for her. “You’ve been happy. You’ve been free. You’ve been having fun. And I’m afraid you’ve gone and fallen in love with me.”

  “No. You’re wrong. I admire you, yes. I want you.” She swallowed. “But I do not love you, Javan Rhodes!”

  Her hands were trembling. She’d forgotten she was holding the strap that held him immobile. He lunged for her and tore it from her hands, then enveloped her in a bear hug before quickly kissing her. “Just tell me one thing.”

  She looked up at him with glistening eyes.

  “Were you telling the truth? Are we having a baby?” She winced but stayed silent. “Talk to me, Sola. Trust me.”

  Her expression slowly went blank.

  “Please,” he whispered, and the agonized expression again leaped into her eyes. He moved his hands to her shoulders and shook her gently. “I love you. Just tell me the truth.”

  She whimpered. “Leave me alone, Javan, or I’ll…I’ll…”

  “Kill me? Kill the man you love? The father of your child?”

  Wild-eyed, she finally said, “I had to get pregnant. If I were just married, my father would have ordered a divorce. Being pregnant… Well, you know the rules. It’s a stupid tradition, not being able to divorce if there are children, but everyone obeys it. Except for my father.”

  “So you’re really pregnant?”

  She looked so unhappy, so…innocent. So miserable. “Yes. I am.”

  He released her and held his hands over his head once again. “Go on, tighten the straps.”

  “What are you doing?”

  “I’m trusting you. I know you’re not too familiar with the concept. To tell you the truth, I’m not too familiar with it myself.”

  “You trust me?”

  He nodded. “I trust you and I love you.”

  “You’re insane,” she whispered.

  “And you’re a psychopath. We’ll make wonderful parents.”

  The tension broken, she laughed. “You bastard!” She gave him a swift slap on the ass. “Go take your shower before I change my mind. I could have killed you, you know.”

  Javan allowed her to see his broad grin as he strolled nonchalantly to the shower. “Don’t be ridiculous. You’re not capable of such a soul-destroying act.” He got into the cubicle, his wrists still tied. He sneaked a glance at Sola and turned on the pressure shower. She looked lost, somehow bereft, but at least she hadn’t killed him. Not this time, anyway.

  “No, absolutely not.”

  “Pastorale is a delightful planet, Javan.”

  “That’s not the point. You’ve never entered atmo before…”

  “I’ve studied the files.”

  “It’s not something you can learn from files. I know you’re brilliant and all that, but trust me, this is far too dangerous. And once you dump me on Pastorale, how are you going to get off the planet?”

  “The same way you do. I’ll slingshot.”

  “Let me guess—you’ve studied the files.”

  She nodded.

  “This is crazy. It’s far more of an art than a science—”

  “It looked easy enough—”

  “Until something goes wrong. No, I won’t allow it.”

  She glanced at his bound hands and raised an eyebrow. “You won’t allow it?”

  “Obey your husband, wife!”

  Sola exploded into infectious giggles, and Javan joined in. She collapsed into his lap, shaking with laughter, and he kissed her neck. She untied the bindings around his wrists.

  “I’m serious, Sola. I’ve watched too many people die at launch and reentry. It’s the most dangerous part of space travel. I’d be happy to teach you, but it takes time and lots of practice.”

  “Then I’ll drop you off at the nearest space station and buy you passage to Pastorale.”

  “No.”

  “Yes.”

  “I won’t…”

  Suddenly Sola was hurled off his lap and onto the floor while Javan desperately gripped the chair. The ship rocked
from side to side. Javan forced his way to the controls and tapped desperately.

  Sola picked herself up. “What happened?”

  “I’m not sure. Are you okay?”

  “Yes, I think so.”

  He checked the puter terminal. “We were just fired upon. A warning shot, I’d say. We have an incoming message.”

  They both looked to the viewscan, where a flickering image filled the screen. It was a young man dressed in the robes of a Blue.

  “Who the hell is that?”

  “One of my brothers, I’m afraid. Put in some jump coordinates while I talk to him.”

  “I won’t have time to check the coordinates. We won’t have time to strap in.”

  “We’ll have to take our chances.”

  Javan linked the sound circuit and crossed to the jump terminal.

  “Sola, big sister, you are to return to Earth by order of the dictator.”

  Sola sat in the command chair. “Now why should I do that, Ramon?”

  The man on-screen smiled unpleasantly. “An alliance has been arranged for you. You either return, or I’m authorized to destroy this ship.”

  “An alliance? I’m no longer in the running for heir?”

  “Not after this misadventure. You’ve proved how flighty you are, just like we always said.”

  “You must be very relieved right now, brother. Less competition.”

  Ramon let out a laugh. “Not at all, Sola. I’m disappointed. I was looking forward to killing you. But now…you’re to be used as alliance fodder.” He clapped his hands in childish glee. “I can hardly wait for you to meet the one you’ve been promised to. He has such lovely plans to declaw you, dear sister. Of course, you could always refuse. It would be nice to kill you.”

  “Yes, I can imagine. After trying and failing so many times before, right, brother?”

  “Well, I did take the edge off my appetite by killing your friends. I can’t believe they thought I wouldn’t find out who had assisted with smuggling you off Earth.”

  Javan glanced up at Sola. Her expression was blank. “So like your father.”

  “I know you’re entering coordinates. It makes no difference. I have a tracking device on the ship. I had it placed on Artemis. I’ll just keep following you. But on our next encounter I won’t be offering you the chance to return to Earth. I’ll just blow you out of the universe. It would be my pleasure.”